finally..

i was successful with my plan. i didnt want to put an end to whatever's been going on between me and jonas... because i know i wouldnt have the balls to stick to my decision, so i just let him be himself and hurt me so id subconsciously reach the point of me giving up...

and now i am gradually falling out of love.

after not texting nor calling each other for two or three days, i gave him a call.

finally.. he ended it.

after more than 7 months of generally being at peace and happy with each other's company.. after all the i love you's and please stay with me..... after all the i-understand statements.... after all the heartaches... after all the sacrifices.... after all the perks... jonas isnt over sam yet.

what kills me more is that he is now entertaining the thought of splitting up with tere for sam.. which he never thought of during our time..

thank you lord for helping me and making me sane and fine.

i am sad.. but i have no regrets. i have loved someone unconditionally, and more than to anyone else.. i should be proud of myself for that.. and i am.

some things arent really meant to be. and of of those is us.

i am sad.. but not for long.Ü